certain constants
Farbeit for me to claim to be Freakytrigger’s fashion correspondent but society has yet to accept my naked form as something appropriate to see on the street and so inevitably, I am driven unto...
View Articleand the hotly fought title of ‘most olive-y olive spread’ goes to
…Tesco’s Finest Greek Olive spread. I hate Tesco for making terrible, flavourless food and being ten minutes closer to my work than Sainsburys, thus far more likely to be my despondent lunch venue of...
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Hauntography: A School Story
Here is a link to the story, which you might want to read instead of the first 900 words of this and here is a link to a word about our Hauntography project. Firstly, mostly to get them out of the way,...
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you shall go to the ball, said the wild things
At some point ages ago I tried to write a thing about comfort pop, after listening to ‘Fight For This Love’ 28674987 million times on repeat but ultimately, saying ‘some songs are quite pappily nice...
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New for the health conscious: composted greens
There are a lot of stupid things that supermarkets do to food that upset me. Wrapping cucumbers is of course everyone’s least favourite example of stupidity at work and washing potatoes counts as a...
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The age of consent
One of the unfortunate results of having grown up in a world where MySpace existed while I was still underage* is that my previous internet selves occasionally rear their ugly heads and bite me. I had...
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Bo urr, carnt see no cowses roun ere etc.
Non-alcoholic drinks aren’t always a concern of Publog but there are perfectly good arguments for sitting in a pub and drinking them, not least because dammit some of them, namely the noble Slime, are...
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Kylie is DRONE ROCK and I HAVE PROOF
From the Board of Unnecessary Science- 1) I accidentally ended up listening to ‘Demon Cleaner’ by Kyuss when trying to listen to Kylie and didn’t notice for QUITE SOME TIME 2) Main topics of Kylie:...
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“If John Grisham had written Jurassic Park, he couldn’t do better than...
(Stephen Coonts, apparently) I like to browse charity shops in search of amazing books. As I’m a bookseller if not by trade anymore then by something possibly stronger than genetics or space-time, this...
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We will make everything metal
A traditional financial pitI’ve long-yearned to write a terrible essay about how the embarassment of Nu Metal changed the face of society. The ways in which the collective falling for Limp Bizkit and...
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The Horticulture of Happiness
A few weeks ago, the Guardian published this (very lovely) piece on the work of botanists at the Herbarium in Kew Gardens: “Plants are not just beautiful, they help us to survive.” It is a good piece...
View ArticleFT Top 100 Songs Of All Time #13: Busted- Air Hostess
We’re big fans of Busted here at FreakyTrigger; speculative futurism, analysis of authority in the education system, asking people to dance at the disco and Thunderbirds are all highly relevant to our...
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Continuous pulse
Lentils. There they are, in one of those giant bags no one can honestly ever hope to use the whole of on their own- I used to get through one a week when I was cooking for four or more most nights but...
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Stand by The Man
In January HMV announced that, due to it and Waterstones collectively flailing around in a mire of doom, it’s going to close 60 stores this year. Gossiping with a bookseller last weekend I discovered...
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Chillian nationalism
Naturally, this image had to be alligned to the right. As Freakytrigger’s vegetable correspondent I find myself often forced into action that seems… well, hippie-ish. This goes against my warlike...
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Feelings are boring, synth lines are awsome
I am a great believer in seasonal music, from the laid-back summer beach track to the frenetic late-season club banger, giving way to the Winter Party Anthem. This last one is no doubt due to my...
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Limited edition Justin Bieber vinyl
Sometimes I manage to get my unstoppable, disproportionate rage at the world and all its absurdity under control for awhile. At these times, I allow myself back onto the internet, which is of course...
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Seasonal slatternry: the festive bacon sandwich
An online shop only describable as ‘prepared for a nuclear winter’ has left us with a severe surplus of meat products. Rather fuzzy headed this morning, it seemed to me an excellent time for a bacon...
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Cheap food we love: bumper edition
Together at lastIt’s been awhile since we last reported on wonderful things you can eat almost for free but as the Cooking For People Who Don’t blog carnival is on food security, it seemed a good time...
View ArticleExpansion pack ‘The Floor’ released May 2012
(Apropos much social media rumbling on Erotic Choose Your Own Adventures and the appearance of whatever Heineken think this is) 1. You enter the club and head to the floor, roll a 3 or higher to light...
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